Thursday, May 12, 2016

Logies 2016

ok so i have to let my overseas readers know exactly what the Logies are.

basically, its the Emmys with no budget, talent, or fashion sense.

apologies in advance for the does in no way represent the Australian sense of style, as clearly, none of the people who attended last nights awards have any.

enjoy x

ok so hair and makeup is pretty-ish, but the outfit is definitely a knock off of Dolce & Gabbana.

and not even a good one. whats with the big black boob circle?

and the sheer fabric looks like cheap sheer stockings. DO NOT LIKE.

ugh i cannot stand this woman. i don't get the obsession, and she's not even on tv. why is she there.

also if you're going to do the whole illusion see through thing, then wear a nude bra love, not a white one.

i do not hate this. the colour is gorj and i enjoy the high neck on her tall frame (and she has great shoulders).

the shoes are less than ideal, and just to put my bitch hat on for a second...

whats with the toes as long as fingers?!

she looks pretty though. one of the better of the bunch.

a bit too bridal and a bit too much fake tan (like 2 bottles too much) but definitely not offensive.

the dress itself is kind of major, however i think surgical removal of the sleeves is needed STAT.

no sleeves = close to perfection.
most the girls from home & away actually stood out to me this year for all the right reasons. turns out summer bay has some style. this colour is divine and the slight strap detailing adds a little something extra. her hair is a bit limp and i could've done with something other than a hoop earring but this was definitely a pleasant surprise.

let me preface this by saying i LOVE a great suit on a woman.

this however is not a great suit.

lets leave it at that.

again...too much fake tan.

love the dress for a picnic maybe...or like a photoshoot in the wind.

BUT she's too short and its too casual.

and unsurprisingly everyones hair this year seems to be limp and underdone. its a consistent theme at the logies. its like DIY hair is a thing.

it should NEVER be a thing.

this is perfectly fitted to her curves, and i do love her amazing red hair like this.

this colour is no good on her though. and she looks like she can't move properly.

she looks like an ageing vegas showgirl.

nice purse mate. matches your duck face blue steel impersonation perfectly.

at first glance this looks ok.

then you look closer and see the horrible triangle cut outs and awful silver beading.

cute clutch though, and the oxblood thing works well again.

nothing about this is ok.

BABE. local legend and long time newsreader Sandra Sully has dressed appropriately and taken the oxblood trend to new heights in this. i don't LOVE the weird curtain flap things but I'm not so put off that it ruins it.

well done, you look hot.

i love this colour.

the dress is a bit high school prom queen slash mother of the bride though. and the side drape looks like an in built bag.

i feel like she's super high and trying to look sober.

the hair is also bad, but the shoes are worse.

ok i don't even know where to start.

the hair looks like plastic. the teeth are reflective. her tan is beyond orange. the sleeves are horrific. the black satin skirt is like an attachment and looks tacky. the whole thing swamps her teeny frame.

to be honest even normally she looks like she would shop at GASP and i really don't like her but this is a new low.

first of all: the crown placement is hilarious.

next: she looks like a coked out party girl leaving a gold coast night club in the early hours of the morning and getting caught by the 
paparazzi. awkward and off her face.

also this is wildly inappropriate for an awards show that is labelled "televisions night of nights". show your legs or your belly, not both dear.

something about this i love, but also something i hate. i can't explain either reactions, but thats where my head is at.

i heard it referred to as a fish caught in a fishing net earlier this week, and I'm not opposed to that. but maybe a fashionable fish at least? i don't know.

angle was EVERYTHING with this look. this photo is incredible and she looks amazing.

however from the front the shoulders went too far down her arm and looked a bit weird.

near the top of the pack though i think. hair and makeup is bomb.

go back to the jungle julia.

i actually love this so much. the colour (again) is so current, and the sheer isn't so sheer that it looks tacky.

could do without the sleeve things but the rest is feminine and gorj.


at first i was like "ooh she looks ok".

then i looked closer and saw a giant mess of 
fabric, overdone makeup and a weird red panel down the front of her. too much crap not enough good.

the plastic in her face is starting to affect her brain.

......sigh. i have no words.

three words:


its like sophie ellis-bextors mum entered a mature age beauty pageant.

she looks like a barbie who got her head pulled off then neck and her proportions are all off.
plus this dress looks like her mum whipped it up on the Janome the night before. also, handy tip: satin creases. why doesn't anybody realise this?

one of the best. theres still something small that doesn't sit right with me but i can't put my finger on what it is...

do like though.

there is so much fake tan on this woman its almost offensive.

i feel like i can smell it from here.

one of my top looks. she looks so beautiful in this amazing D&G dress. appropriate and fashionable without going too over the top or wearing a see-through dress, like so many women are doing these days.


the hair, the seam line, the weird tummy cutout...

all bad.

she looks like she's hiding some weird growth on her head under that hair.

ughhhhh i so want to love this. bec usually gets it so right.

the skirt on this is epic, but i hate the sparkly Hervé Léger inspired bandage top.

plus for someonne who is 16 weeks pregnant with twins, she is painfully thin.

not a fan.

another case of something that could've been great, but isn't.

remove the sleeves and redo the hair and we can talk.


and those shoes are all wrong with that dress...which is also gross. i won't even start on the jewellery.

Deltas face is so bloody gorgeous i almost thought this was nice.

then i looked past her neck and realised she is wearing...THAT.


i love lee lin no matter what she wears.

go check her twitter, and thank me later.

oh good god.

another case of how can anything look bad on someone who looks like this.


have all these women got illegal sun beds in their houses?! so much over tanning it looks revolting.

and the dress looks like bad curtains.


her perfume ad proclaims..."sometimes I'm right. sometimes, I'm wrong"

actually Gina, i think its more of a case of ALWAYS wrong.


theres part of this that i enjoy, but i think the underlay distracts me. which is hard cos sheer dresses usually need that.

which i think i why i don't like them very much. PLUS...theyve been done. move on.

nice try. didn't work.


aaaaaahahaha. what even is there to say about this.

LOOOOOVE. contender for my best dressed.

the colour, the lips, the cut. EVERYTHING. megababe.

i actually really like this. i just wish she would've gotten rid of the little sheer panel and just left it open. she looks glam and sophisticated though.

LOVE LOVE LOVE. fun and flirty and her body looks incredible.

love the roses too. she looks like a hot version of the salsa emoji, and i dig it.

wannabe margot robbie at the oscars.
don't copy something unless you are sure you are doing it better than the original.

and this is 100% NOT better. her body looks banging but once again, THE HAIR IS UNDONE. plus her makeup is virtually non existent and her expression is obnoxious.

this couple epitomises the logies to me.


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