Tuesday, May 5, 2015

MET GALA 2015

the more i look at this the more i like it. this morning i didn't get it but now i think its one of my favourites. ahhh how luxurious to be so flippant.

i still hate her though.

this i hate out of complete and utter jealousy of her perfection.

(honestly...i love it. bitch.)

i can't decide whether the blue squiggles on the bottom look like casper or the genie from aladdin.

and that hair. suri should not be your inspiration.

LOVE. none but diane could pull this off and it she does it with ease. and bless pacey he's just so adorable.

who knew FKA stands for FucKing Atrocious?! thanks for clearing that up.

the top is gorgeous, the bottom bland. and her tan is ombre from her head to her hands.

hey that rhymed.

ughhhhhhhhh perfection. this dress is liao bu qi.

that's amazing in mandarin by the way, thought id get in the spirit of things.

how embarrassing to wear katy perry's hand me downs from the punk themed ball 2 years ago. awks.

baaaabbbbbeeeeee. she looks like an oscar and i dig it.

i literally don't know what to say here.

oh wait yes i do, you look shit and the wig is gross.

I'm quite happy for her to be called felicity again after this. she's finally redeemed herself after the haircut incident of 1999.

bahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

hahahhaa.

ha.

all i can think of when i see this photo is the noise homer simpson makes when he sees donuts. she is my donut. and she's perfection. easily in my top 10 of the night.


twin vamps. twin wins. stunning as per usual.

side note: wtf has happened to mary mates face? 

jason statham is one lucky son of a bitch. DAMN AFRICA!
nice...safe...bleh.

beautiful dress...but i think she stuck her finger in a socket just before she hit the red carpet. theres no other explanation as to why teddy charles would publicly stand near this hair.

another case of "the more i look at this the more i love it". somehow she managers to pull off literally anything she chooses to wear.

face and hair = AMAZING VAMPIRE REALNESS.
dress = makes a victorias secret supermodel look like a sausage.

lets be honest here: alexa could make adidas snap pants and ugg boots look hot. so yeah she looks beautiful.

however this dress is gross and don't even get me started on the kitten heels.

doing aussies proud. what a fox.

A+ for effort a-keys but F for execution. i don't feel like you and Jean Paul should be friends anymore.

who invited barney?

stunning. seriously gorgeous.

oh good god just go away already. and while you're at it get a better stylist.

OH MY GOD SHE FINALLY TURNED BACK TIME.

but seriously what a babe. i wish my nan looked like this.

its hard for a supermodel to look bad, and caroline trentini does not let us down. gorgeous.

pretty.

thats about it. honestly I'm more interested in the hooker boots behind her.

cara wtf.

PUT DOWN THE PIPE ALREADY ITS STARTING TO AFFECT YOUR LIFE CHOICES.

i know none of you but i love your outfits. lets have shots at the bar later. 
that awesome moment when you look like you know more about fashion than your mum. who happens to be anna wintour.

that awkward moment when you look like you know less about fashion than your daughter and you happen to be anna wintour.

ok so if you haven't, do yourself a favour and watch the chloe sevigny series of videos on YouTube. its not her its a guy pretending to be her but it will totally make you feel better about this horrid outfit. 
yeah she's hot. yeah he's cute. and yeah I'm bored.

i hate her sooooooo much. but i love this.
no really she's the reason i didn't watch homeland.
i hate her.

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE WEARING YOGA PANTS AND SLIDES TO THE MET GALA!? GTFO RIGHT NOW.

50 shades of hooker dress.

i really love this. she's a mega babe.

i don't love her cheese grater hand bag though.

i don't care what she wears she's grace offing coddington and she is queen.

seen better gigi. soz.

no blurred lines here. she's incredible.

dylan lauren. i would really like to sit down with you and talk about how you decided to wear this. I'm not trying to be a smartass here I'm genuinely interested in how your brain works.

ok maybe I'm a smarts but come one, what even is this.

see above. except i don't want hep c so i dunno if i would actually sit down with this one.

i hope i look like this one day.

so many people i don't know, so many outfits i love.

im concerned about how many My Little Ponies had to die in the making of this outfit.

fierce. bringing S&M to the met and i like it.

jennifer connelly looks like she raided david bowies costume closet from the Labyrinth and the clothes are still too big for her.

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE.

SERIOUSLY LOOK AT THOSE LEGS.

ugh why are you even here child go home its past your bed time.

im torn between bowing down to this 45 year old (45 YEAR OLD) woman for her amazing bod and shaking my finger and telling her to be more age appropriate.

you can choose your own adventure here.

this is literally my favourite look of the night sheerly for the amount of laughter i get out of it every time i see it.

WHAT A FUCKING JOKE GET OFF THE RED CARPET.

kanye i love you but i blame you for her attendance. anna is clearly so far up your ass her judgement is clouded. kim is one thing but THIS?! she's a disgrace to the human race.

i like this dress enough but i just had to include it to point out that THIS IS THE LESBIAN FROM MEAN GIRLS.

LOOK HOW STUNNING SHE IS.

i hate you madonna. you're a sad old hag who has stayed too long at a party you aren't welcome at.

props for wearing clothes this year though.

this is a case of beautiful dress, suitable for the theme and not too extreme to be considered outlandish. stunning.

considering who this is, i actually love it. you go girl.

i don't know what when wrong here. you used to be a princess for goodness sake.

i can't even manage a snore this is so boring.

sizzling hot. that smouldering stare is the perfect accessory.

PERFECTION. she makes topless look classy.

um cirque du soleil called, they want their tent back.

i dont understand it but solange can do no wrong it my eyes so ill support her choice.

you just overtook your dad as the hottest Kravitz. Brava.


marnie, i hate you in girls. but i LOVE LOVE LOVE this Giambattista Valli dress. stunning.

once again i actually hate anne hathaway with so much passion, but this is a standout for me. bold and beautiful.


no-one who's dress is the same colour as their skin, hair AND eyebrows should look good. but this is candice so normal rules don't apply.


she was the first guest i saw and her accessories are still my favourite by far. that head piece is out of this world. the dress i could take or leave but goddamn she can pull a look together for the Met like nobodies business!


from the front this is a big old mess. BUT THAT TRAIN....heaven.


kim is finally having her Met Gala moment here. i don't care if it looks like Beyonces from 2012. whatever. she looks incredible and those curves are killer. she is absolutely stunning.

and lets all just appreciate Kanye's fringed scarf and velvet jacket. DUDE CAN DRESS.
AND MY WINNER IS.....









BOW DOWN TO THE QUEEN OF THE MET GALA 2015. QUEEN BEY SLAYS EVERYONE INCLUDING HERSELF.  

considering she's basically wearing some strategically placed crystals and some nude heels, nothing can compare to this. in her own words...

I WOKE UP LIKE DIS. 
FLAWLESS.